Sick and Dying
Date: Saturday, September 27, 2008
I feel sick. *coughs loudly* *sniffs badly*
I am feeling extremely irritable bcos I have an annoying cough and a nose that keeps running as if it was scared of me. I even have sore throat. The cough helps make things worst. I had to pop pills and eat cough medicine to get rid of the cough and running nose temporarily. Which is not much help. I wonder how did those virus get to me. Is the culprit the air-con classroom again? I just recovered and now the second time is much worst than the first time. I have been sleeping for the whole day as the pills make people drowsy. I feel like sleeping again. Perhaps after typing this post I will go and sleep. My voice has also changed into some weird noise. I hate having a flu!
The construction going on outside my house is making me crazy. The banging and all sort of sounds make me go crazy. As if having a flu was not enough. I still have to sleep with those banging noises and what nots. I feel like screaming.
I have to study but cannot bring myself to study. ): My 1st exam is starting on Monday next week. Third Lang. I have a feeling I cannot live up to the expectation of my teacher who expects at least 70 and above. I have a feeling I cannot do as well as the last time. I am afraid that my results will revert to the original state. Uh Oh.. ):
Having Ms Ling tell us about the physics paper which was set very very very tough makes me feel very demoralised and I am scared. I do not want to fail again. I have been failing since I don't know when. I have a feeling the physics teachers are sort of sadistic, they want us to fail. Cos the papers have always been set to fail. The only time I passed was like the moments test,. That one was like at least our standard, not something high and out of our reach. I wished the eoys would be like that. But I know its not possible. With the big black loom that I am going to fail again, I feel very sad. ): I am emoing right now.
I cant wait for eoys to be over. I will step on my books and throw them. But I cannot throw physics, cos according to Ms Ling, nxt year we will be tested on our sec 3 to sec 4 topics. Which = to dying. We cannot cope with sec 3 and have already forgotten what was taught at the beginning. Then at sec 4 they expect us to have good memory and remember everything from sec 3 to sec 4. I have a feeling I am going to fail during that time. I made a horribly wrong choice to choose physics. It is so not my subject.
To top it all, translation, we don't even know the format. The teacher seems to be as clueless as us. I have no idea at all what is coming out. And so far, I have not ever done translation homework and let her mark it. I don't know where is my standard at all. )): I am sooooo dead.
LA, the letter writing. I also have not tried writing letters before and having it be mark. I think I am going to crap something that is out of point. Oh My God. This thing is killing me.
When can eoys be over? When can this horror end? When can this waiting end?
sometimes, even though you try your best, you cannot get what you work so hard for. Thats life for you. ):
I am so worried and scared for eoys. What would happen to me if I do badly? )): I wish there is no worries and tests in the world. It would make the world so much cuter and a nicer place to live in.
Signing Off~